4th round, day 7 update

So went in for my first blood and ultrasound this morning. The news is that follicles on my right ovary haven’t really responded and are all less than 10mm. My left ovary is a little better with one around 13mm and a few other smaller ones. All in all a piss poor response really. The sonographer asked if I had any stimulation that’s how poor the result is.
My bloods showed my estrogen was still only 240 two days ago so I’m thinking that ill probably be this cycle for a while yet, or maybe it will get cancelled. So much for this bullshit being over and done with quickly! Sorry for my rather negative attitude, but F**k!! Feeling down trodden and like I’m failing at everything right now. Maybe this is a sign that I should just give this away and try and get some normality back in my life. The thought hurts too much. To think of having to get rid of my all packed up baby things truly is too much to bear. Reality is that both options suck! Both giving up and accepting reality or keeping on this crazy roller coaster which is IVF!
I’m so distracted of late. I forgot to have my meds last night and woke with a start at 11:30 and jumped out of bed to take them. I left some medication on the kitchen bench for a day which was meant to go back in the fridge and I don’t know why. I saw it there all day but it still didn’t register. Feel like I want to crawl under a rock and ignore all this stuff.
What do you guys do when your feeling crappy like this? Day off work? Change of scenery? Drink? Lol haha need them all right now
Love and light to you all xx